Snowvicous
by Joelie and Jasmine
Summary: Twins girls who are madly in love with Harry, come to Hogwarts, along with a very odd 'friend' of Malfoy.Soon after chaos decends on the castle. A prank duel, rabbit tails and ears what else will happen with these two in Hogwarts? INSANITY.


LOTSHA: hey fans this is LOTSHA if you've read my work you'll know me.  
  
Jou: why are we here again?  
  
LOTSHA: because I wrote you here OK anyway this time I'm here with a friend of mine everyone welcome Daniel Radcliffe's Secret Admirer  
  
All: hi DRSA*waves*  
  
Jou: I don't get it why is she here anyway?!?  
  
DRSA: I'm working on a story with her duh!!!!!!  
  
Jou: a Jou/Mai?*looks hopeful*  
  
DRSA: nah it's Jou/Otougi  
  
Jou*looks scared* I'm NOT gay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
LOTSHA & DRSA: coulda fooled us  
  
Otougi: hey how mean can you be  
  
Jou: yeah what he said  
  
Otougi: I mean I'm not gay everyone knows Honda and Jounouchi are together but not me. Me and Jounouchi's sister on the other hand.......  
  
Jou: why you get back here I'll kill you if you touch my sister*runs after Otougi with a mallet*  
  
LOTSHA & DRSA: uhhhhhhhhh guys can we get back to us now?  
  
Yugi: sure what's the story about?*blinks innocently*  
  
LOTSHA: actually it's a Harry Potter Humor/Parody  
  
Anzu: k.... where are the characters from that story?  
  
DRSA: they're right heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrreee!!!!!!!!!!!!*holds up book 4 and pulls the characters from the book* ahh Draco* looks scared than whispers* I had a bad dream. Ron make me feel better*pouts*  
  
Ron: uhhhhhhhhh I think I'll stay over here with Hermione  
  
DRSA*looks innocent* I'm not gonna steal you from Hermione I just think red heads are hot!  
  
LOTSHA: me too!!!!!  
  
Hermione: me three!!!!!  
  
Ron: hmmmmmmm I'm getting more attention than Harry I must be in an alternate universe.  
  
LOTSHA: nah you're on my computer screen*smiles evilly* about to go into our fic  
  
Ron* looks terrified* noooooooooo not that anything but that!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!  
  
LOTSHA: don't worry Ron we won't kill you or turn you gay promise*looks sincere*  
  
Ron: well ok no one dies right  
  
DRSA: only the blonde one*looks at Draco scared and pokes him with a stick*  
  
Draco*grabs stick and breaks it as Ron laughs his ass off*  
  
LOTSHA: anyways let's start the story  
  
DRSA: yes let's ok anyways disclaimer we don't own Harry Potter J.K. Rowling does  
  
LOTSHA: we do however own Joelie, Jasmine and Janen.  
  
Warning: Insanity, Out of characterness, sexual comments, foul language  
  
Ron: on with the story  
  
***Snow Vicious***  
  
'They just stood there looking at me, who are they? What do they want?  
  
"Who are you?" he calls with a distant sounding voice.  
  
He hears laughter, it's coming from them. Both were dressed from head to toe in black, almost like muggle ninjas, and they had their faces covered but he could tell they were girls. How he could tell was beyond him.  
  
"Who are you?" he repeated still with that distant voice.  
  
The two 'girls' laughed again, turned and walked away into the darkness.  
  
Harry awoke with a start.  
  
'What was that all about?' he asks himself.  
  
Harry looked over at his alarm clock and saw that it was nearly time for Hermione to arrive and bring him to school.  
  
He glanced in the corner where his trunk sat packed, and threw back the covers, he got out of bed and walked over to his wardrobe, and he picked out some cloths and quickly got dressed. Loud snoring came from Dudley's room telling Harry that his cousin was still asleep. Harry could hear muffled voices coming from the kitchen informing him that his aunt and uncle were awake. Opening the door he walks down the stairs and turns into the kitchen.  
  
Aunt Petunia calls "Is that you, Dudleykins?" she turns, spots Harry and dryly says "Oh, it's you. Where's Dudley? Is he not up yet?"  
  
"Oh, I hexed him" remarks Harry just as dryly back, then as though as an after thought he looks out the window and says "You might want to water that hedge out there, I think it's beginning to wilt." Aunt Petunia goes as white as one of her bed sheets, and runs to the sink with her watering can. Uncle Vernon points at Harry and spits.  
  
"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!?!?!?!?!?"  
  
Just than Dudley himself waddles through the door still in his pajamas, and whines, "What's all this noise about? It woke me up!" Aunt Petunia runs over to Dudley and starts to check for any signs of magic.  
  
"Well, I better go bring my stuff down stairs. Hermione will be here soon." Harry says as he turns and walks out the door, a little while later Hermione and her parents show up and introduce themselves to the Dursley's, who scowl and cower in a corner not knowing that they are Muggles too. Then they take Harry and leave.  
  
Mr. Granger helps Harry put his luggage into the trunk of the car; they get in the car and drive to Kings Cross, on the way Harry and Hermione make idol chitchat. At Kings Cross Harry and Hermione get trolleys and walk towards the barrier between platforms 9 and 10. They say goodbye to Mr. and Mrs. Granger and go through the barrier to platform 9 ¾. As they look around they notice that barely anyone's on the platform or in the train.  
  
"Let's go get a good compartment before they're taken," Hermione says. They get a compartment and stow their luggage overhead. After a long and boring wait, for Harry, while Hermione talked about all the extra work she did and all the books she read over the holidays, Ron stumbled into their train compartment. As he stumbles in, lugging his trunk, Hermione jumps up and says "Hi Ron," a little too loudly and wakes the silently napping Harry. Harry looks up and says,  
  
"Hey Ron what's up? I hope your summer wasn't as boring as Hermione's." Ron smiles and Hermione fumes, and starts yelling at Harry,  
  
"What do you mean, BORING!?!" yells Hermione.  
  
Ron, struggling with his trunk curses as it almost falls. Hermione, hearing that Ron needed help settles down and 'helps' Ron put his trunk into the overhead storage compartment, but instead of helping, she just makes it worse and Ron's trunk falls and pushes them into a seat together, Ron on top of Hermione. At that moment two girls walk by and one of them sees Ron trapped between Hermione and his trunk, and rushes to help him, with a bit of Harry's help they get Ron's trunk into the overhead compartment. Hermione and the girl who helped both blush for mostly the same reason. Harry and the other girl glance at each other and stifle their laughter. After a few minutes of getting settled down the two girls introduce themselves.  
  
"I'm Joelie Buley," said the girl who helped Ron. She had long brown hair with red highlights, and blue eyes she was wearing a straight knee length red skirt and a red form fitting t-shirt along with pink heart earrings.  
  
"And I'm Jasmine Buley," said the other girl. She had long red hair and green eyes she was wearing tight lavender flares and a form fitting purple t-shirt that said 'Good girls are Bad girls who don't get caught' along with dangling Silver Star earrings.  
  
"We're twins" they chorused together.  
  
Ron, Harry, and Hermione nodded and introduced themselves, than Joelie and Jasmine settled themselves in seats and started talking about what they did over the summer, everyone interrupted or ignored Hermione until she stops talking suddenly, than with Hermione's sudden silence; everyone turns to look at Hermione who is scowling at the door. Everyone turns to see what she's looking at. They see Malfoy and his little cronies  
  
"Hello Potter," Malfoy says coldly. "How does it feel to be the cause of the dark lord's resurrection?"  
  
Harry scowls at Malfoy and says, "No one here wants to talk with you so why don't you and your goons leave."  
  
"Or you'll do what Potter!?" Malfoy growls and they both pulled out their wands.  
  
"Malfoy I'm so glad I found someone I know." Says a girl who looks as if she just walked out of a medieval history book picture, she comes up behind Malfoy and puts her deep red velvet arms around his waist, forcing him to lower his wand, "I was so lonely," The girl says putting her head on his shoulder. Than noticing that there're other people in the compartment and says "Oh, hello, my name is Janen," Janen releases Malfoy and curtsies, "Malfoy introduce me to your friends."  
  
"Potter and his loser friends are not m-"  
  
"Potter! Harry Potter and I suppose the loser friends are Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger? Well it's wonderful to meet you." Janen says extending her fingers to Ron and Harry, who take them gently and introduce themselves.  
  
"I'm Ron,"  
  
"And I'm Harry Potter," Janen holds onto his finger for an extra moment, and smile.  
  
"And I'm Hermione Granger, it's wonderful to meet you," Hermione says and reaches out to take Janen's hand, but Janen pulls her hand back, nods her head and does a slight curtsy. Hermione puts her hand down looking offended.  
  
"How do you know that snake Malfoy?" Hermione asks Janen.  
  
"Well we live right next to each other." Janen says smiling.  
  
"Snake how dare you say that to me you Mudblood."  
  
"Malfoy! Watch your language! Apologize to Ms. Granger." Orders Janen sternly.  
  
"Are you out of your mind Janen?" he asks shocked.  
  
"Than you aren't getting ANY tonight from me." Janen says. Malfoy opens his eyes really wide (quite a funny look on him) and had to work to regain his composer. After a few moments says.  
  
"Sorry Granger," Malfoy says in icy tones, "happy now Janen?" Malfoy snaps.  
  
"Very"  
  
"You better be. Until next time Potter," Malfoy storms away after scowling at Harry.  
  
"Hi I'm Joelie," the girl in red says introducing herself to Janen.  
  
"And I'm a lesbian, nice to meet you," Jasmine says.  
  
Janen looked thoughtful "Really!!" she made the word as long as possible.  
  
"Uh, she's my sister Jasmine and she's a little strange sometimes," Joelie explains, then sighs.  
  
"How can you stand him" asks Jasmine with a look of disgust on her face.  
  
"We don't talk much," Janen answers, and smiles. "It's good to meet you but I would like to get back to my compartment so I may take a nap, before we arrive at the school. Have a nice day."  
  
"You too."  
  
"Bye."  
  
"Thanks." replies everyone as Janen waves as she leaves.  
  
"So anyways" Ron says, "What's wrong Hermione?"  
  
"I don't like her; did you see how close she was to Malfoy? And I've never seen her at Hogwarts before, have you?" Hermione says suspiciously.  
  
"No I don't think any of us has," says Jasmine looking at everyone who shrug's their shoulders and shakes there heads.  
  
"Maybe she's been transferred like us," says the Joelie.  
  
"Maybe, but there's just something about her that I don't like." Says Hermione.  
  
"Well she seemed like a nice enough person other then being friends with Malfoy,"  
  
"Yeah, I agree with Harry, she seemed very polite, and she even made Malfoy apologize, did you all see the look of horror on his face it was so wicked. I would have thought you would have made instant friend's." says Ron as he grin's from ear to ear.  
  
"I totally agree with Ron," the twins say in unison and then laugh.  
  
"I suppose your right, but. I don't know."  
  
"That's a first." Ron whispers loudly.  
  
"RON!" yells Hermione as she blushes, and everyone laughs and push's that resent engagement to the back of their minds as the candy trolley woman knocks on the door.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
The train crept to a stop in the town of Hogsmeade, and as the compartments on the train emptied the platform grew more and more cluttered and Hagrid's voice could be heard above all, shouting "Firs' years over 'ere"  
  
Slowly Harry, Hermione, Ron and their new friends the twins Joelie and Jasmine Buley, made their way out of the train and towards the horseless carriages that lead the second years and up to the castle.  
  
Ron ran a little ahead to get a carriage for the group so they wouldn't have to take separate rides.  
  
"I've got one!" called Ron who waved his hand in the air as the group approached.  
  
"Thanks Ron, now let's get to the feast." Harry said excitedly.  
  
Jasmine looked over at her twin sister who had red highlights in her over the shoulder brown hair and red outfit and said "I wonder what we're supposed to do when we get there, do we go with the other fifth years or what?"  
  
"I dunno, but we can ask one of the teachers when we get there." Joelie replied looking at her red-haired and lavender covered sister.  
  
As soon as everyone was seated in the carriage it began to move.  
  
"So what's it like at Hogwarts Hermione?"  
  
"Well Joelie, it's the best wizarding school in the world and I don't have anything to compare it to, but Hogwarts is magnificent." Hermione stated.  
  
"Some of the teachers aren't very nice, but Dumbledore is fair."  
  
"Yeah, Harry's definitely right, Snape has got to be the meanest teacher there and Professor McGonagall is strict, but fair too." Ron added. "Sometimes" he mumbled as an afterthought.  
  
The twins nod and sit quietly for several minutes while they wait to get to the school. Then suddenly the carriage jerked to a halt.  
  
"We're here." Said Ron stating the obvious.  
  
The group all got out of the carriage and Jasmine and Joelie look up at the school for the first time with absolute amazement.  
  
"Wow, I never imagined it to be so huge." Jasmine sounded slightly breathless.  
  
"Common, it's even better inside." Said Ron "Let's go."  
  
The twins blushed and looked around, noticing for the first time that all the other students were stepping out of their carriages and heading towards the school's front doors.  
  
The group walked up the steps to the big doors and walked into the entry hall where hundreds of other students were standing around talking and greeting, laughing and shouting. A couple said "Hello" to the group as they walked toward the dining hall looking for a teacher.  
  
"Buley's?" asked an old voice from behind the group suddenly. The group quickly turned around to face a stern-faced witch with her hair pulled into a tight bun, Professor Minerva McGonagall.  
  
"Yes we are." Chorused the twins.  
  
"Good, now we need to find Janen White, have you met her?"  
  
"Yeah, on the train, she might be with that boy with white hair."  
  
"Malfoy!"  
  
"Thank you Potter, I thought it was him. You wouldn't know where they would be than would you?"  
  
"No idea." Said Ron dryly.  
  
"Ok then, would you two come with me, I need to find her before the sorting." Professor McGonagall said to the twins.  
  
"Ok," they chorused.  
  
"She looks like someone who just stepped out of a medieval history book or something." Jasmine said trying to be helpful.  
  
"By the way I'm Joelie and this is my sister Jasmine."  
  
"I'm sorry I didn't introduce myself I'm professor McGonagall."  
  
The three walked around the great hall for a few minutes until they spotted Janen.  
  
"Janen,. Janen," her head snaps up from her book when Joelie called.  
  
"Miss. White would you please follow me."  
  
They entered a small room off the hall, "Please stay here for a few minutes until I return," Professor McGonagal said before rushing out the door.  
  
"So Janen, what house do you think you'll be in?" asked Jasmine sitting down in an arm chair in front of the empty fireplace.  
  
"Not, Slytherin or Hufflepuff but Gryffindor maybe but I want to be in Ravenclaw. Yourselves?"  
  
"We really have no idea what house we'll be in, I just hope that hat thing doesn't spit up me and Joelie."  
  
"Hufflepuff is out of the question as far as I'm concerned."  
  
"Good, good." Janen sits down under one of the lights in the room and begins reading again.  
  
Jasmine and Joelie talked quietly until Professor McGonagall came back in to get them.  
  
"You three will go into the dining hall with the first years. Then you will be called upon to be sorted before the first years. Then the sorting will continue as usual. Understand?"  
  
"Professor McGonagall." The three chimed.  
  
Jasmine, Joelie and Janen were led into a room full of first years and then everyone departed the room and crossed the entry hall and went into the Dining Hall, which was filled with hundreds of black pointed hats. The first years and the twins along with Janen all walked between the Slytherin and Hufflepuff tables and lined up in front of the teachers' table facing the house tables.  
  
Throughout these proceedings it was mostly quiet except for the occasional point and whisper in the twins and Janen's direction, so when Dumbledore stood up the hall went completely silent.  
  
"Today is a very special day." Dumbledore started, "Not only because we have a batch of new first years, but also because we have three new fifth years joining us as well." Shouting and clapping erupted from the tables.  
  
Dumbledore raised his hands and silence fell again. He continued "It's been almost forty years since the last time Hogwarts has had any late arrivals of this sort." Dumbledore pointedly looked at Harry and Ron, and continued "So it is my duty and honor to introduce Jasmine and Joelie Buley from the Canadian School of Magical Arts and Janen White from Merrick's School of Potions and Plants." Everyone politely clapped, whooped and whistled until Dumbledore raised his hands, "Let the sorting begin."  
  
Professor McGonagall brought over the stool with the sorting hat on it and unrolled the first part of a long scroll and said, "When your name is called come forward, sit on the stool and I will place the hat on your hat. Buley Jasmine."  
  
Jasmine stepped forward, sat down and the sorting hat was placed on her head, immediately it started to talk to her "So you don't want to be put in Slytherin, eh, so where do you want to go? I see loyalty in you, that would be good for Gryffindor what do you say to that? Yes. OK than GRYFFINDOR!!" the last word was shouted out for everyone to hear and the Gryffindor table erupted loudly.  
  
"Buley Joelie." Called Professor McGonagall and the room went quiet again. Joelie stepped up and put on the hat, it said to her "A good mind, good for Ravenclaw, but a mischievous soul like your sister. Slytherin would also be good for you. And you definitely don't fit into the Hufflepuff category. Where do you want to go in your heart? Gryffindor with your sister, fine your family loyalty has put you in GRYFFINDOR!" yelled the hat and the Gryffindor table went crazy again.  
  
"White, Janen." Professor McGonagall called as Joelie walked over to sit beside her sister, Harry and the other Gryffindors. When Joelie was seated, Jasmine elbowed her in the ribs and pointed a little down the table at two cute redheaded twins who looked up and smiled broadly at them. Joelie looked at Harry and asked "Who are they?"  
  
Harry grinned and said "Those two trouble makers are Fred and George Weasley, they're Ron's ol-" Harry was suddenly interrupted by a great yell from the Ravenclaw table and Janen walked over to the table and sat beside a girl reading a magazine upside down.  
  
"Older brothers" Harry finished.  
  
"Cool but what do you mean by troublemakers?" Jasmine asked innocently.  
  
"Well, my brothers are mostly just pranksters, but they also do other stupid things to get into trouble."  
  
A Sudden burst of clapping from Slytherin announced the first of the sorting.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
After the great welcoming feast all of the Gryffindors followed Ron and Hermione the new Prefects upstairs and through the portrait of the Fat Lady "Watersnufflers" and entered the common room where Fred and George started a game of Exploding Snap and brought up cakes and snacks from eh kitchen and 100 Butterbeers from Hogsmeade. The welcoming party continued until Professor McGonagall came and told everyone to get to bed.  
  
Jasmine and Joelie shared a dorm with Hermione, Lavender and Parvati, the two Buleys delightfully discovered that their trunks had already been brought upstairs.  
  
They changed into their Pj's (Jasmine's lavender and Joelie's pale pink) and climbed into bed being totally exhausted and excited for their upcoming first day at Hogwarts.  
  
To be continued...  
  
LOTSHA: I hope everyone liked our first chapter of SnowVicious it'll get funnier later.  
  
DRSA: yeah a lot funnier lets just say it involves Joelie's pet snake  
  
LOTSHA & DRSA: anyways please REVIEW OR OUR INSANITY GOES FORGOTTEN  
  
RANMA! HARRY POTTER! DANIEL RADCLIFFE! RUPERT GRINT! KAI HIWATARI! RAY KON! RYOU BAKURA! 


End file.
